zen

" I’m not going to be the girl you marry, but I’ll be the girl you’ll be thinking of 20 years from now while you engage in polite sex with your boring wife who fakes her orgasm to make you feel better about your receding hairline. "

hennyandcoke:

Marry your best friend.


conchitawurst:

neptunain:

we need better sex ed because I know a girl who thought that the female orgasm always involved squirting so she fakes by peeing on guys and this needs to stop

Let her continue

(via mvmvburrit0)


captainlucifer:

erocsan:

captainlucifer:

if a guy friend that you’re romantically interested in asks you out, reject him first as a test to see whether he’ll get angry and accuse you of friendzoning him or respect your decision and be willing to carry on being friends

Example of why women are fucking crazy hahahaha

i’m a man

(via rocksikk)